Pets Are Better at Grief Support Than People, Study Says

When you’re in the thick of it, grief feels like an anvil tied around your ankles. It’s a familiar, weighty thing that we drag from room to room, and too often, no one knows how to talk about it. After a while, friends and family might ignore the big metal thing at your feet or even resent it.

They turn and walk away in the street, or they begin hinting that they miss the “old” you. It’s no wonder people sometimes turn to animals, who have been scientifically proven to be better at grief support than people. 

Dogs are better at comforting grieving people than humans.

A 2021 study published in the science journal PLOS ONE found that grieving participants were far more satisfied with the support they received from animals than from humans. The numbers are staggering. Out of 248 participants, 89 percent of those who received comfort from a pet or animal reported being either extremely or mostly satisfied. For comparison, online grief groups scored second highest with a much lower satisfaction rating of 67 percent. 

Study author Joanne Cacciatore, a professor at Arizona State University’s School of Social Work, was not surprised by these results, given the anecdotes study participants had shared with her about the lackluster support they received from their own species.

“People talked about how when they started crying, human beings would literally turn away from them, or walk away, or tell them to go get a drink,” Cacciatore says. But animals were different. They were patient, generous, and non-judgmental — and, crucially, that did not change over time.

“If someone’s child dies, people do show up,” Cacciatore says. “But six months later, people go back to life as usual. It’s very hard to stay with even the concept that children can die.” Animals, on the other hand, were unwavering in their support. 

“They came from the living room into the dining room and sat next to them and put their head in their lap,” Cacciatore says. While people tend to back away from grief, animals offer ongoing emotional acts of caring.

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Pets are better at comforting you than your relatives.

The difference grievers felt with animals versus their loved ones is even more stark. While counselors and therapists came in third on the satisfaction ratings and in-person grief groups came in fourth, friends came in fifth with a satisfaction rating of only 52 percent. Family came next at 40 percent satisfaction. 

“Human beings don’t know how to adequately provide that level of emotional support that’s so needed, especially by those who are some of the most vulnerable people — those who have suffered traumatic loss,” Cacciatore says. At some point, she added, “We have to be able to confront our fear and our terror of loss happening to us. It’s not contagious.”

Pet parents are probably not surprised to hear that animals are better at grief support than people. After all, who among us hasn’t confided in our familiar at one point or another? This study’s findings also jibe with prior research from other institutions. 

Time and time again, scholars have proven that animals really do have quantifiable healing powers. Just ask the more than 200 emergency room patients who participated in a 2022 study also published in PLOS ONE. Those who spent 10 minutes with a therapy dog reported less pain afterward than those who went without. Last year, another study published in the psychology journal Emotion found that after a stress test, dogs relieved anxiety and boosted participants’ moods better than coloring or waiting for 10 minutes.

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Grief-support skills are not limited to dogs and cats.

In the case of Cacciatore’s study, however, the benevolent animals were not just dogs or even cats. Participants also found solace in other animals like horses, goats, and pigs. In 2022, Cacciatore authored another study that examined the therapeutic effects of interacting with animals on a care farm — and, more specifically, learning about those animals’ traumatic histories. 

When asked why animals can be so much more reassuring than humans, Cacciatore emphasizes their capacity for unconditional care. “Animals didn’t judge,” she says. “Animals didn’t rush. Animals didn’t try to change how the person who was feeling sad was feeling. They just showed up. It's almost too simple for human beings.”

Quotes from participants in the 2021 study highlight just how meaningful animal-human companionship really is. One person who lost a son said that sometimes during walks with their dog, “I talk to him about my son, and he has no choice but to listen because he’s a dog … a loving comforting animal.”

That, more than anything, is what Cacciatore believes all humans can learn from animals — especially when it comes to supporting the people we love through a devastating loss. “The way animals show up is really, not to sound fluffy, but in the heart space,” she says. “They show up without any expectation of changing our emotional state.”

In other words, animals have mastered acceptance — a virtue we could all stand to embrace more often, whether we’re grieving or not.